Heart Flow of Shamanism Experience

Once in a while we have experiences that grab us by the heart and hold it safely, that guide us to dig deep inside and promise to point to the gems, that illuminate our shadows to release their grip, and that ask us to be seen and show us we are beautiful...

It was a weekend in May, one quite unlike any I’d ever had before that my heart was tenderly held, that I struck a gold mine within, that I simply let go, and that I claimed and believed my true worth. It was a weekend of clarity, certainty, acceptance, and safety.

This gift of time, energy, and space was shared with ~25 other unique and wild hearted souls at Northern Edge Algonquin, located at Algonquin Park Access Point #1. I was honoured to share this experience with one soul in particular, my beautiful friend Amanda of Amanda Urbanski Creative Photography. Amanda and I took part in Heart Flow of Shamanism to have our own time for reflection, dream time, and growth as well as to tap into a more intuitive leadership and facilitation style that will support us in leading the upcoming Finding Freedom Desire Map + SUP Retreat at Northern Edge Algonquin on June 24-26.     

I have felt a pull towards exploring Shamanism since my first visit to the Edge in 2013 however the Heart Flow weekend was my first Shamanic gathering. I was incredibly curious to see which practices and aspects resonated with me and to follow my desire to connect further with the natural world. From this experience I would describe Shamanism as tapping into the everyday extraordinary and achieving balance and harmony of nature and of self. It was absolutely powerful.  

While I cannot possibly capture the magnitude and beauty of the connection, the feelings, and the breakthroughs here for you I would love to share some thoughts on what I cherish from this experience, what to expect if you are heading to a retreat at the Edge, as well as some personal pieces that came up for me.

Photography by Amanda urbanski creative photography

I CHERISH

• The still moments and the silence: as our music came to an end, that kissed the air after a deep sharing, that allowed for more eye contact, that held space for what was yet to come, that invited dreaming and imagination, where we could just be - just feel.  
• The breathing room throughout the weekend that was sacred and allowed for time to process and the opportunity to check in and ask yourself and act on what it is that you need / what would support your journey.
• The way we were all held together in community and in circle. I cherish that we were facing inwards, growing together and witnessing each moment side by side. Every member of the circle was on the same level, all on a journey, all still becoming.
• The canvas top cabin that Amanda and I rested our heads in at night. We were protected yet so deeply connected to the elements and environment around us.  We fell asleep to the sounds of spring peepers and loons and were serenaded awake to soft rain, drumming, and a wooden flute. We woke up in the morning surrounded by snow – it felt like pure magic. We were shown that a short walk in the woods to sleep in the top bunk of an unheated cabin in near zero temperatures can reset your beliefs in what you need to be comfortable and will warm your soul more than a million nights in your very own bed.
• Being immersed in sound. The wind whistling through the tree bark, the wind chimes, bells for storytelling, the ocean drum, making music together, and the sound bath continuously held me in the present moment, out of my head and connected to my senses. Sound provided higher vibrations, beautiful energy, resonance, and connecting on the same frequency. Sound is POWERFUL and it got me dreaming about the potential of sound as a tool for coming back into our body, into feeling. 

WHAT TO EXPECT

• Learning happens always. Perhaps some of the most incredible conversations and connecting happens in between the ‘sharing’ sessions, at the dinner table, and hanging out late at night in Points North.
• What you ‘plan’ to say in a sharing circle isn’t what will actually come out of your mouth. You can try to find the words inside of your head but the moment you speak your voice will put forward what some part of you knows needs to be heard or needs to be said.
• Releasing happens when you aren’t expecting it. There will absolutely be unexpected moments of POWER. You will be caught off guard. If you feel disconnected or closed off even for a moment, your release is probably just around the corner.  
• It is an absolute GIFT to be totally disconnected from technology. You will FULLY + completely experience every moment of the day – you will be fully engaged with all senses. You will not check the time (and won’t desire to), you will release your tick to reach for your phone, you won’t have anywhere else to be, you won’t have to spend any time preparing food… You will be free. (+ will have a very tough time turning your phone on for the first time afterwards)
• When you are at the Edge it is a time to ask for guidance, signs, help, and clues. Most importantly – if you ask for them you have to respect what appears.
• You must move into your senses in order to fully feel and experience– tips: stand in the wind, dip your toes in the water, tune in to the wind chimes, smell rose water…

PERSONAL PIECES

• The ‘word’ that brought me to Heart Flow of Shamanism is leadership. After I spoke the word I realized that when I made my inner landscape {click to read} a few weeks back the words that I had placed over my mouth were ‘emerge a leader’.
•  When we arrived we connected with a tree and did a dream stick gathering – When I saw my stick the wind picked up and the wind chimes and bark on the trees started to whistle. I placed my hand on the tree and a piece of bark curled around my finger, holding me there until I connected with the message of climbing up to see the bigger picture from greater heights.
• My dream is for leadership of myself and of others. How do I want to lead myself? What qualities do I want to embody? I feel a call to step forward and show the way is safe – “I’ll go first”.
• We performed a power animal retrieval however I was unsure of what was coming forward and kept asking “Is this mine?” I felt a physical sensation of the animal for reassurance. Messages of ‘I see you. You are ready’ and that I’ve put myself here to be seen.
• During our power animal journey I was led to climb a stairwell leading to the cosmos, followed by a rapid descent on a leaf in a mudslide. We were to be led by our animal to a door and when I came to a dead end the radiating soundscape of the sound bath that we were immersed in encircled me upwards where I was able to see my journey from greater heights. Looking back I could see that I had walked through invisible doors any time that I had committed, trusted, and had faith in the journey.
• I asked: Am I willing? {click to read}
• I learned that to put dreams into motion you must not only envision it but you must physically move through it – perhaps a moving meditation. You must play it out both in your mind and in your body. To wake the dreams into reality is to engage your senses fully so that you are in the experience. Your imagination is needed.
• I connected to messages that my dreams flow in my veins, they live within my cells – to access them I need to connect to my wild-hood, magic, experiences, senses, play, and imagination. 

Heart Flow of Shamanism was without a doubt the most deeply extraordinary experience that I've ever had which provided me with clarity and assurance that nature knows the way, when we are truly connected within ourselves and are brave and willing -- deep down we know the way, and that when we hold a dream within a community we can co-create the way. The way to love, to peace, to acceptance, to balance, to harmony, to beauty --- I'm on my way.